Gorash Family

Jane is now a Big Sister.  It has been interesting seeing Jane grow up. She can't depend on me as much anymore. Im recovering and can't attend to her as often.  She's kindof been forced to kind grow up. But she adjusted so well. Jane gets herself fully dressed. She can now walk to the car and get in the carseat herself. She can get herself a snack in the fridge. Jane is such a sweet big sister. She loves Gracie so much. She loves to give her kisses and wants to hold her. Janes Favorite Shirt. She loves showing it to everyone My pregnancy with Gracie was tough. I was nausea all the time. Car rides were the worst for me. I survived on mineral water and crackers the first trimester. My 3rd trimester I suffered with sciatica pain. It was my hardest pregnancy physically. All my other pregnancies, I hardly ever got nausea or any symptoms but tiredness. I know; its a blessing. My pregnancy with Gracie was normal. Gracie was healthy and growing well. No complications with ...

Have you ever heard the song, "We all bleed the same" by Mandisa? The lyrics go like this, "we all bleed the same, we're more beautiful when we come together, we all bleed the same, so tell me why, tell me why, we're divided." The song goes about how we need to come together. We may look different on the outside, but we all bleed the same on the inside. We need to love and support each other more. Jesus loved people. He loved thieves, tax collectors, diseased people, poor people, children and His followers. He loved people who were devoted to Him and those who were different from Him. His love is the same today. Because we are loved by Him, we are called to love like Him. We need to stop criticizing and judging each other. We should be compassionate and supportive towards one another. God commanded that his people encourage one another because he knows we need it. In John 16:33, Jesus warned that "in this world you will have trouble," Which he then...

When I found out about Janes condition, I didn't know how to process all the feelings. All I could do was cry. My kids stood there watching me, not understanding what was going on. I sat there in the ultrasound room and started to pray. I knew only God could truly understand what I was feeling and he'd be able to comfort me. I started going to a prayer group in my church once I was pregnant with Jane. God put me in that group at the perfect timing. I was able to build that friendship and trust with the girls. Then when I found out Jane had the tumor, I was able to confide in them and they became my support group. It's been a blessing in my life; being able to share and bear one another's burdens. If you don't have a prayer group. I'd strongly recommend it. The prayer group wasn't the only ones praying for Jane. We had people pray from all over the world, praying for Jane and I. Some of them I knew, others I didn't. People would write, call or tell me i...

I still remember the day I was in the doctors office for a follow up appointment with Jane. Jane was 5 months at that time. I was trying to decide which path to take towards correcting her clubfeet.  At this point, I've tired all other options, and nothing was helping her feet stay straight. So I came to her clubfoot doctor to discuss the clubfoot process. As we were discussing Janes feet, the doctor told me "She will never walk"  but we should still go through the process so "her feet would be straight and look pleasing to the eye." His words exactly. It's was so tough to hear. Jane had a few different doctors examine her feet. She had a nerve conduction test performed on her legs. We've seen different massage therapist, chiropractors, did laser therapy, seen a neurologist. We've tired everything we could think of. The nerve conduction test results showed that Jane had nerve damage in both her legs. There was also muscle imbalance on both of her leg...

We found out Jane had hip dysplasia when she was about 3-4 months. We had suspicion earlier on because her right foot would always be up next to her right ear. If she wasn't swaddled, thats where her foot automatically would go. So she had an x ray done around 3-4 months and the doctors confirmed she had hip dysplasia but in her LEFT foot, her right foot was totally fine just flexible. Hip Dysplasia means, the foot isn't in the hip socket. It doesn't cause pain in children but it can cause a lot of pain later on in life if not fixed. We decided we wanted it fixed. Jane was still not walking at this point and because her leg wasn't in the socket, it caused a leg length difference. We knew that if we wanted her to walk, this was something we needed to do. It took us 3 months to see the hip specialist and talk about the procedure. By that time, Jane just got done with her clubfoot surgery, so the doctor wanted to put this surgery off until Jane was wearing the shoes and ba...

I'm a planner. I like knowing things ahead of time and I like to be prepared for everything. So when the doctors told me Jane had clubfeet, I was in a little denial.  I thought, maybe her muscles are just tight after surgery. Usually clubfeet is diagnosed during pregnancy via ultrasound. I've had many ultrasounds with Jane; no one ever mentioned the possibility. I've never even heard that clubfeet is a thing. When I found out Jane had clubfeet, I didn't know much about it. My doctor told me she'd need casting for about 4 weeks, but didn't explain the full process. I didn't know she'd need surgery afterwards. So we did 4 weeks of casting. Thinking after those 4 weeks, her feet would be corrected and we'd be done with clubfeet. After the 4 weeks, they wanted to schedule surgery (cut the achilles tendon.)  It wasn't a complicated surgery, but it was still surgery and I couldn't just agree with it  right away. Remember I'm a planner, I need t...

Jane spent the next few days laying on her stomach as her incisions were healing. She had a lot of swelling from the surgery. I had to wait 6 days to hold her. Even then it was with a pillow in between us. She was in so much pain, I had to be careful not to move her too much. I was fortunate enough to be able to stay with Jane the whole time. I couldn't sleep in the NICU, but they allowed me to visit as often as I wanted. Every morning the doctors had a meeting and talked about Jane case. How she was doing, if there was any changes needed to be made to her pain medication, nutrition, etc. Originally the doctors told me that 6 days after surgery she'd be able to come home. However that was not the case. We spent two weeks in the NICU. Jane was in respiratory failure and was on a ventilator.  Her heart had a few holes. She had hypoglycemia, hydronephrosis, leukopenia, hypernatremia. Jane was getting my milk through a feeding tube. She wasn't able to nurse. She then got jaundi...